Often I hear individuals and couples state that they are not happy in their relationships, and divorce becomes a quick remedy to problems that are often deep seeded. I’m starting to think that the idea of marriage is entered into under a misconception. There are many valid reasons for divorce such as abuse and addiction, but, my concern is that marriages cannot survive a minimum of five years in many cases. Where are the communication and problem solving skills that were once used to maintain long-lasting marriages? What sort of happiness are those who have short-lived marriages looking for? I am a firm believer that your spouse cannot be the source of your happiness. Perhaps more time should be spent creating happiness before marriage, and developing a relationship with God; which is where I believe true happiness originates.
The misconception comes from the idea that everyday spent married will be full of happiness and joy, and there will never be any conflict or sorrow. Wrong, marriage is a 24/7 job responsibility, it takes a considerable amount of work. There are many cycles in marriage such as adding children, growing older, children leaving the home, retiring, and loosing parents to illness and other reasons. The Family Cycle requires understanding, maturity, dedication, a relationship with God, and a certain level of selflessness.
What misconceptions have you created in your marriage? How have these misconceptions affected your marriage?